Friday, August 31, 2012

10 Things I Miss About Europe

You knew it was coming.

I had been putting off a real conclusion to this blog. With the conclusion of this blog is the cessation of an adventure that doesn't deserve to be confined to a manageable read. Only the 73 other travelers that joined me will understand what I mean by that, but I'll do my best to try to echo what it feels like looking back on this trip.

I'd need nothing short and nothing limited to something to the effect of A Tale of Three Cities to really get my point across. But Travels of Tara will be my start.

Being in America, even in New York, considered the greatest city in the entire world [with merit], was a hard pill to swallow. I vowed that I wouldn't let my exploratory, energetic, and eager manor that I strengthened overseas go to waste here, but it is still hard. Though there is so much diversity and so many opportunities, there are just some things that America will never be as keen on as Europe.

*Heath Ledger Joker Voice* and here. we. go.

10. The Euro
My avid readers may find this ironic. Way back in the baguette days, I made my position on the currency exchange very clear.

the euro sh*ts on the dollar
I am now retracting it.

I came to see the logic in using a coin for 1 and 2 euro denominations.  "un euro? toma." It's like meter money; chump change. Just take it. We all know that when we have bills, it is a much harder stab on our American money hungry hearts to see it go. Why not make it easier and just make it a coin? Especially when just one of those round metal trinkets can be traded in for a beer.

And the bills? Euro Euro Bills. A 5 is smaller than a 20 is smaller than a 50. Brilliant. So even when I'm 10 euro beers in, I can still find the 5 for the cab driver.


9. The Language Barrier 
Initially, one would not see this as something that one would lament. But oh, do I ever. I miss being in a cafe of Parisians and, knowing full well what they are saying is negative, being able to zone out when I want to or be able to fight back via facial expressions.

They can pretend all day but they can't deny those stars and stripes are fabulous
In Italy, a friend once made mention of how everything sounds so urgent with their inflection. A simple invite turns into an imperative shriek. "WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO TO THE MOOOVIES WITH ME!!!!" How much more likely I am to agree! Everything is like a beautiful song and dance because you can make it out to be that way.

 I miss the way that, however annoying the neighboring conversation may be in volume, the context completely evaded me. In America, when the woman pretending to be 22 when she's clearly 49 is guffawing over mimosas about how much of a headache she has from her wild night, I'm only aggravated at her efforts of stupidity. If she were talking in French, I could just laugh at her wanna-be walk-of-shame ensemble and not have to want to rip my ears off, Van Gogh style. 

Ignorance truly is bliss.


8. Foreign Children
Much like I feel about Miss Middle Age, hearing loud children beg for cookies or to go potty gets old fast in English. But in Italian it's ADORABLE. Especially when you point it out to your American friend and the kid looks at you like you're from outer space. 
I now understand why Angelina is an adopt-a-holic. 


7. Pistachio Flavor
America: home of the free samples, land of the artificial preservatives. All of our junk food from Famous Amos to Skittles are culinary corruptions. They have a longer list of ingredients than Gene Simmons has of partners and they leave you wanting more due to their affordability and abundance of options.

Let's be real, how many times have you fought over the only red Starburst in the pack?

But in Italy, their shiny star of snacks is the pistachio. Who would have thought? This expensive little California-grown nut can be transformed into a frothy green frozen treat. Gelato, McFlurries, you name it.

You order it. You enjoy it.


6. Exotic Chips
Pistachio not exotic enough for you? Dislike the salty but sweet taste? Good thing it's basically only available in Italy. Every country, however, has their own regionally distinct flavored chips. 

The first bag I shoved my gluttonous little hand into was in Paris. Saveur Bolognaise. The bag depicts a garlic clove, a tomato, and a red sweet pepper. The bag holds a blast of unstoppable goodness. 
If that's not necessarily exotic, never fear. Also featured in France is what we liked to call the Turkey Dinner chips. It was nothing short of all the flavor and, by the time you finished the whole bag, an eighteenth of the nutrition.

But the meat packing didn't end there. The first day in Spain I was privy to their hot commodity: jamón. They found a way to harvest all the delectibility of slaughtered pig into a crisp potato chip in a purple bag. 


5. Siesta
What goes up must come down. 

After running around every city looking for the best and the cheapest eats, picking apart every brushstroke in paintings, nothing was better than curling up in our shaggy dorms and knocking out. 

Before class, during class, indiscriminate. 

The way my trip was set up, I had the grace of the angels land me in Spain during the last leg of the trip which mean from 2-5, the entire city of Sevilla closed up shop, went home, and slept. Large Scale Nap time. That is the way every country should be (but never will.) 

America is so worried with staying open 24 hours for convenience. We have everything open on holidays. We are a country of working and providing while they are a country of living. So their economy is falling apart... America is so hung up on money that staying awake to spend it is more of a burden than an enjoyment.
 
4. Everything Is Art
La Sagrada Familia is art as well as a perpetual work in progress.
Bridges built by kings. Museums created from palaces and prisons. Fountains!

Whatever you walk on is the product of a world renowned artist. And it's all in the open for you to touch, photograph, swim in [illegally], or vandalize. But no one does. 

It is so part of their culture to accept and respect Bernini sculptures that spew water. What we consider to be done "behind closed doors" is done on stage. Guys in tight sparkly pants stab bulls to death as people watch and cheer and secretly hope the bull's horn gets a stab. Weekly church goings are at cathedrals comparable to museums. Driving through what armies marched under is simply how you get to the store. 

But it is still so much more appreciated than any of our graffiti or hipster styles.
 
 3. Public Transportation
No time to get a good glimpse of the Paris subway trains.
Here, the announcement "please stand clear of the closing door" suggests that everyone on the platform make up their mind on whether or not they'd like to partake in the current train trip within about 20 seconds, because then the train is taking off.

In Paris, whatever it is they say over the loud speaker directly translates to "you better have all your limbs through that door because we have to be at the next stop within five seconds." And they mean it. 

I've seen backpacks lost and pickpockets succeed because, once those doors are closed, the holy grail could be on the other side and the conductors wouldn't care.  


2. Defined Culture
I have a theory that these colors are meant to
depict the tainted, sinful ways of the human soul
to remind the Pope's entourage to stay in line. 

America is all about improvements, even if that means fixing what's not broken. Though we come no where near having as much cultural background to sit on as the rest of Europe with it's ancient wars and kingdoms, if you walk outside you see nothing but the 20th century. Our nostalgia is confined to our minds and not physically preserved. 

There, they don't care that the Vatican guards look like clowns. Even with their loud pride-esque ensembles they are notorious.

Spain doesn't care that America stole their religious garb and turned it into the icon of racial hate crimes. They still hold their same processions and pay homage to the same beliefs they have always stood on. 

Venice is well aware that it's going to sink into the water and join Atlantis. But they still continue to live in this waterlogged houses and commute on their boats because that is what they are used to and far be it from the laws of nature to tell them otherwise.  



1. Being American 
You never need a special occasion to represent America.
Everyone at one point in their life wants recognition. Even though we strive to fit in, we crave attention and the way to get it is to stand out. Standing out in Europe was absolutely NO PROBLEM WHATSOEVER. As much as I still felt at home and still felt like an expert on their kings and their artists, I never hesitated to represent. 

I wasn't too shy to speak aloud among the dead silence of the Paris trains.

I wasn't going to simply let some guy sit in my overnight train seat that I paid for just because he wants to pretend he doesn't speak a lick of English.  

I became that girl who was constantly saying "Will you take a picture of me?" "Excuse me, can you take a picture of us?" "Oh I have to take a picture of this bird on this sign that I can't read."

a little taste of home
I came home with an American flag scarf that I bought in Florence... come on. 

I guess it's good to be home. But only because absence makes the heart grow fonder.